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A personal blog. I am an: Award-winning writer. Non-profit entrepreneur. Activist. Religious professional. Foodie. Musician. All around curious soul and Renaissance man.


Tuesday, January 6, 2009

I Used to Like Sports...

...until I moved to Columbus, OH.

My gosh. "Buckeye mania" is the city-wide obsession here. It is the lifestyle. And it's a little too much for me. That's saying a lot, considering the fact I'm from Cleveland, which is known for having some of the most hardcore, loyal fans in the land.

What Columbus has is something altogether different. It isn't loyalty. It's ridiculous.

I tell people here that I don't like the OSU football and they literally look at me like there is something wrong with me, like they don't even want to be around me and certainly don't know what to do with me. I sense true anger, like I just announced that I had committed a crime. People here do worry about physical violence in such situations. God forbid you buy a blue car (the trademark color of Michigan) and leave it on the street on the wrong day.

You would think this were a tough town, from all this talk. I don't see it. Fans here are a little spoiled. Their team gets spanked in one game and they get all depressed. It takes the wind out of the entire city. People walk the streets all quiet and gloomy. Where is the anger, where is the outrage? When they win a game, there is euphoria and cars burning. There was a span of several years where people just expected to win every game.

I used to be okay with sports. I liked to root for the home team. I have followed some teams for a season or two. I was right there during some hard fought nail biters on the lake up north. But I've come to a point in life where I realize that time is limited, and I don't want to spend one second on some enterprise that I could care less about. The amount of time and energy this town devotes to OSU football tipped the scales for me from ambivalence to outrage, and I want nothing to do with it.

I don't care about your tailgate parties or all the inane post game wrap up. I don't bleed scarlet and grey, and I don't get a rush returning a volley of "O-H!" with "I-O!" I won't wear a hat that looks like a stadium, nor do I have any desire to dress like Jim Tressel. It's all a little too much like watching paint dry to me.

"Hang on Sloopy" is still a great song, though. One of the best, actually.

10 comments:

  1. Tee-hee. Michael is an OSU fan. But unlike a lot of the OSU fans, he actually graduated from OSU. So I give him points for that. And he's not one of those hysterical types. Though, he does get depressed when they lose. And he didnt stop dating me because I dont care for football. I've tried to watch some games, but football bores the piss out of me... I'm a baseball girl and I will continue to route for the "home team" until the day I die. =)

    Hey, I need something to get all up in arms about, throw my blood pressure out of wack, now that we dont have actual human sacrifices like in the days of Rome. ;) I need to get that animalistic "beat the enemy" energy out of my system somehow, else I will start taking it out on my fellow man.

    Michael also has an OSU cycling jersey. But he's a little miffed about it because it is maroon and not the "real" scarlet.

    One guy in our club has a Michigan cycling jersey because he went there.

    The two growl at each other from time to time when these jerseys are donned.

    The OSU cycling jersey WILL NOT become our "uniform" on the tandem.

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  2. Sloopy lives in a very bad part of town.
    And everybody,
    yeah,
    tries to put my Sloopy down.

    So I sing out...

    Hang on, Sloopy!

    Hang on!

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  3. Not everyone can rock a sweater vest like Jim Tressel.

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  4. Just remember, "Hang on Sloopy," although having a strong link to OSU, is not exclusive to OSU. It's the official rock song for all of Ohio, even those of us Ohioans who graduated from Hiram ;)

    If you've never read the resolution that made this song the official state rock song, do it. It is hilarious! http://www.ohiohistorycentral.org/entry.php?rec=1878

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  5. Great post! A sane voice among the multitudes. I got to hear some of this spoken aloud in my kitchen about two months ago and I loved every minute of it!

    There's something to be said for 80,000 people or so all getting together for something regularly. My mom, when she acknowledged the existence of TV and professional sports once a year or so, wondered what else all those folks could do with that energy and passion.

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  6. I dont know. I'm kind of on the side of "crazy fanaticism." You've seem me at a Star Trek convention... I kind of dig getting all worked up and crazy about something. When I look at Bucks fans acting all weirded out and annoying, I dont spend much time worrying about their mental state or being frustrated by it because I know in certain situations I've been known to be just as obnoxious about something.

    Who was holding up a sign that read "Blake's Babes" at the Indian's '07 ALDS game and purposely tried hard to get on the jumbotron and then was eminately please when we did get put up there?? Could that have been Diane and me?? And her brother and husband had their faces painted blue, red, and white. Hmmmmmm...

    I think it's healthy. It keeps us from actually craving the kind of events they used to have where gladiators killed each other or lions ate a bunch of Christians while spectators delightfully watched and took bets. At least with sports, no one actually dies. Even if we make death threats at the umpires for bad calls. I think it releases some of our animal instincts and makes us kindler, gentler people out in the real world.

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  7. Sports give our communities a chance to rally around something. In these days when cities in towns have less and less of an identiy, sports is one of the few places where that is still strong.

    But I take issue with the mis-spent energy, too. Someone once pointed out that when the Cleveland Browns left town there were near riots in the streets. Yet, schools and churches can barely stay in operation sometimes, kids are getting shot up in school and the dropout rate is out of control, and all you hear is just seeds blowin' down the highway in the south wind.

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  8. Okay, you may have a point there... rioting is completely stupid, especially when your team WINS (as has been the case in the past with teams). That's definitely misused energy.

    The kids who are shooting kids in school need to become INVOLVED in sports to release some of that negative energy they are feeling and give them good endorphins for wellbeing. ;) I've always involved in one sport or another (soccer when I was a youth) and I find that it really does keep me sane.

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  9. I'm not talking about the kids who are involved in the shootings. I'm talking about this:

    Why do people riot in the street when the Browns leave town but there are no riots when the kids are failing out of school?

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  10. Um, because people care more about sports than actual education. You've seen how some parents will allow their children to cheat on their grades--how teachers and school administrators will be lax on the requirements for athletes--to keep the kid on a sports team which is viewed as more valuable than, you know, actually having real knowledge.

    I mean, athletes are still held in higher regard than someone who's smart. It's sexier to be an athlete and more lucrative evidentally.

    Brains is not really something our society puts a high priority on. I mean, look who the country elected as president for the last eight years. What do people say when you ask them why they would vote for a guy who sounds like a moron? They say, "Cuz he sounds like an everyday guy."

    Sorry, but I want the guy running the country--head of everything in the US--to be smarter than me. He better be smarter than me. He better SOUND smarter than me. He better be more educated than me.

    Personally, I think I could run circles around GW in a debate and I'm a lousy debater. I definitely feel I've got more brains in my pinky finger than he does in his head. Of course, I didnt spend my college years snorking coke...

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